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do you like me + yes/no = will the games ever stop?

November 15, 2010

This past weekend I had the pleasure of going to several social outings where of course the topic of discussion, especially when there are several single people present, took a turn to dating and relationships. One of the main issues that turned up was the sense of insecurity that happens when you like someone. It seems as if, that no matter the age or even maturity, there is and always will be some sort of insecurity that comes in expressing your like for someone. I mean, I get it. Its simply the risk of rejection that keeps most of us from revealing our true feelings for someone. It seems as if it would simply be easier to send her/him a note, similar to the one above, that asks the age-old question “Do you like me?”

We seem to find comfort behind that note. Why is it so difficult for some (be them female or male) to go up to someone that they like and simply express how they feel? Are we still at the age where we would rather risk rejection over the possibility of love?

Thoughts?

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4 Comments leave one →
  1. Tori permalink
    November 15, 2010 10:56 am

    I don’t think you ever get over that insecurity, regardless of how old you are. No one likes to be rejected. However, there’s always a 50% chance that you will be. I think too many of us wait on the other person to make the first move or we wait for the invitation, so to speak. I think those of us in the 25-35 range have dated enough to know in those first initial moments whether or not anything “special” is going to happen upon meeting someone. And it’s the risk factor as well. I think we’ve been conditioned to play things safely; uncharted territory is scary.

  2. Trice permalink
    November 15, 2010 12:18 pm

    I think it’s deeper than just getting rejected. Personally, I get nervous because I want to give off the right impression. I am not as worried about being rejected as I am that I will say something to embarrass myself. Nervousness is a natural human reaction in this type of situation, but it is what holds me back the most. We all have had that moment when we opened our mouth and were totally mortified by what we heard ourselves saying. Or, even worse, nervously rambled on…and on…and on until you want to just disappear.

  3. angel d. permalink
    November 15, 2010 12:52 pm

    Great post! I think you hit the nail on the head. Fear of rejection as well as the shattering of illusions can be a major factor. Nothings worse than the i think he/she likes me because of. ..etc…and that warm fuzzy feeling only to find out they don’t really feel the same as you. Ouuuuch! Burn! 😉

  4. Chrissy permalink
    November 15, 2010 12:56 pm

    It’s an issue of courage. It is far sexier for a man to come up to me and express his feelings rather than expect me to somehow know he’s into me. Of course it’s scary. . .but it shows courage. I cannot deal with someone that is too scared to talk to me. Show me that you’re able to keep up with me, show me that you have the balls it takes to put yourself on the line. I will respect you for that alone. It’s that moment that’s divine, just after he, or she, tells the object of their affection how they feel. The anticipation, the fear, the what if. . .that’s what’s missing from dating. We hide behind our text messages, emails, dating sites which are just the modern form of the “check here” letter to avoid rejection. How boring. How safe. Not to mention the time it wastes. I’ll take some rejection with a side of scary any day.

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